Love Letters
Share your experiences being single next to a couple or group of couples.
You’re reading Meredith Goldstein’s Love Letters newsletter. Each week, Meredith shares tales of human connection, thoughts on public policy and relationships, and behind-the-scenes stories about the Love Letters column and podcast. Sign up to get the dispatch.
First, a callout.
I am working on a story and podcast episode about the concept of being a third wheel.
Do you like being a third wheel? How do you define the experience? If you’re single, do you dislike hanging out with couples?
I’m curious about how this experience shifts with age and experience. Is it worse to be single with couples when you’re younger … or older?
For single people, being the third wheel can bring up a range of emotions — from feeling left out to completely at ease. And for people in relationships, there’s also the question of how often you invite one single friend to spend time with you and your partner, and what that dynamic looks like in practice.
Please tell me stories and feelings. I have my own thoughts about third wheeling – I have been a proud third wheel! – but I want yours.
You can respond to this email with your story.
Also, remember, Love Letters is always accepting questions. This is a great week to ask about whatever’s on your mind. I’ll be in pajamas reading.
Tell us in the form below, or press this button for the anonymous form.
Readers: Have you ever been a third wheel?
Face to face
Last week I promised I’d share a bit more about the couple featured in our most recent podcast episode, “Mi Amor.”
If you haven’t listened: the episode is about Christina Toledo and her husband Nexan Aroldo Asencio.
Nexan, who’s from Guatemala, crossed into the U.S. illegally about a decade ago. He was immediately arrested and deported – but then crossed back into the country, eventually settling in Massachusetts.
Over the next decade, Nexan worked in construction. He met Christina, who was born and raised in New Jersey, and had moved to Massachusetts.
They fell in love, got married, and had twin sons in 2021.
Not long after that, Nexan received approval to begin the application process to become a legal permanent U.S. resident.
In May, though, even as his application was pending, he was arrested by ICE.
Our episode follows the story – and what happens next for Christina and Nexan’s family.
Some extras:
This is a Boston Globe story written by immigration reporter Giulia McDonnell Nieto del Rio, who’s in the episode. Usually this article is behind a paywall, but for Love Letters people, it’s now unlocked.
It features more information about Christina and Nexan’s kids and how they fared during Nexan’s detainment. It includes gorgeous photos taken by Pulitzer-winning Globe photographer, Jessica Rinaldi.
It’s also a story about how kids are affected by ICE raids and family separation, in general. (I recommend reading after you listen to the podcast episode.)
I promised some more pictures, so you have faces with voices. Most of the episode features Boston Globe immigration reporter Giulia McDonnell Nieto del Rio telling the story, but we do also share recordings from Christina and Nexan.
Wax off
I’ll leave you with a photo of what it looks like to feel exhausted and used after a holiday season. She needs to be cleaned and have a rest.
— Meredith
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